HBWnovel Chapter 116 Don't Embarrass Your Mother
Chapter 116 Don't Embarrass Your Mother
"Xie Wan..." Luo Wuchen grabbed my hand, showing a pleading and fragile expression, as if he wanted to explain something to me.
But before that, I obviously gave him so many chances to explain, but he didn't seize it once.
Not once.
It was as if my heart had been punched hard, and the pain and anger of being deceived made me tremble uncontrollably.
Instinctively, I wanted to shake off his hand, but I could only forcefully suppress this urge because I was concerned about Demon Lord Sangluo who hadn't left yet.
I don't want to argue with Luo Wuchen in front of outsiders, and I don't want to make everything too ugly in front of outsiders.
That would just make me look like a joke.
I've... already been ashamed enough, I really don't want to lose any more.
"Release." I looked at Luo Wuchen indifferently, and said calmly.
"Cangyu's small sect, it's not worth Mozun Lingjue staying here for such a long time, or should I say, Mozun Lingjue—" I gritted my teeth, and my voice was as cold as ice, "what else? The goal has not been achieved, do you want to continue?"
Luo Wuchen's pupils trembled: "No..."
"It's not what you think, Xie Wan, calm down, don't listen to Sang Luo's bewitching..."
"At this point," I can't describe the anger and disappointment at this moment, "you still want to belittle others, Luo Wuchen, you really make me sick."
Luo Wuchen was stunned, his face paled instantly.
After I finished cursing, a wave of regret rose in my heart again, and I felt that I had spoken too harshly and it was too harsh.
Realizing my own thoughts, I felt that I was really not up to date.
He has treated me like this, yet I still subconsciously care about his feelings.
It's so cheap.
"There is no need to involve other people in the affairs between us." I clenched and loosened my hands, loosened and clenched again, "Let's save the last bit of decency for each other."
In fact, I really want to know, when I am complacent about the tenderness he revealed to me, and when I imagine my future with him again and again, what does he think of me?
What kind of mentality is he holding, watching me be so infatuated with him?
Are you mocking my stupidity?Are you proud of your own charm?or something else?
I can't think deeply, I just feel shuddering.
Perhaps from the very beginning, he just wanted to find the shadow of his dead wife in me.
I have lived for a long time, experienced a lot, and seen the filth in the world, but there has never been a time that made me sick like this time.
Thinking back on my liking for Luo Wuchen for no reason, I really wondered if I had been given some kind of ecstasy soup.
There are so many beautiful, gentle, or handsome devils and witches who like me, why do I have to fall in love with a human race?
He was still a person who already had a family, and his position in his heart had long been occupied by his deceased wife.
I was too self-confident and too obsessed with sex, I just thought that as long as Luo Wuchen also liked me, even if he had a Taoist partner, even if he had a succubus that he loved deeply, it didn't matter.
I think this way, the past has happened and cannot be changed. I cannot veto a person's present and future because of his past.
Luo Wuchen's Taoist companion has passed away, but I am still alive.
As long as Luo Wuchen likes me, I can create more futures with him.
But where did I think, from the beginning to the end, he didn't need the future I envisioned for him at all.
He just wants to dwell on his past with his late wife.
There has never been a place for me by his side.
The only person I fell in love with in my life, was also the one who humiliated me the most.
This is the most intolerable thing for me.
I can accept that he doesn't love me.
After all, liking him is my own business, not that I like him, he must also like me.
but……
As long as I think about it, before, I couldn't wait to hold my love in front of him, thinking that I was in love with him...
But Luo Wuchen, from the beginning to the end, only regarded me as a substitute for his dead wife.
The shame and anger of being tricked and deceived almost burst my heart.
"I'm not..." Luo Wuchen had a trace of fear in his eyes: "Xie Wan, it's not what you think."
He said it, as if there was something else hidden.
But what secrets could there be?
I looked at him, my heart was like a pool of stagnant water, and I couldn't make any waves for him anymore.
"Xie Wan, listen to me..." Luo Wuchen trembled while holding my hand.
"Listen to me, I don't think of you as anyone..."
His voice was very soft, dry and so hesitant, which to me sounded like a sign of guilt, which made me trust him.
From the time I knew him to the present, I never knew that he could also say so many words at once.
It turned out that he had...
Just don't want to talk to me.
"Xie Xiaowan——" Xu Fanglai's voice came from afar, his voice was like a stone falling into a well, breaking the stagnant deadlock forcefully, "I heard from my juniors that you were drinking at Feiyan Peak ? Why don’t you know to bring me one?”
Before the others arrived, the voice had already appeared one step ahead of time.
I took a deep breath, suppressed my ups and downs, and looked at Xu Fanglai as if nothing had happened: "Why are you here?"
Xu Fanglai stepped in carelessly, "I'll supervise you."
"——What's the matter with you?" Xu Fanglai's voice faltered, and he took a few steps to look at me in front of me: "Xie Wan, why do you look so ugly? Could it be that you drank too much?"
"How much wine have you drunk, your face is pale...Are you drunk? How much is it?" Xu Fanglai raised a finger to gesture in front of me.
How could I have the heart to play jokes with him at this moment, so I casually slapped his dangling hand away from my eyes, and said lightly, "I'm not drunk."
Sangluo Mozun brought two jars of wine, and only had time to open one of them. Up to now, I have only drank two bowls, far from being drunk.
Not only was I not drunk, on the contrary, I had never been so sober.
All the doubts are connected in series, and the truth will be revealed. I can no longer pretend to be deaf and dumb, and deceive myself and others.
and……
I looked at Luo Wuchen.
Luo Wuchen's never-before-seen expression said everything.
If he wasn't guilty, how could he...
Most of the demons have violent temperaments, and my temper can be regarded as a relatively gentle and tolerant one.
As long as I can do something that can help others, I will never refuse.
If Luo Wuchen had explained this at the beginning, I might have refused to get along with them, but I wouldn't be as angry and sad as I am now.
Even, for the sake of Xiao Changan who misses his dead mother, I might agree to spend time with him.
But I really can't accept it... The two people I believe, who I really want to accept, who are very important to me, have never cared about me from the beginning to the end.
What is all this?
I was like a jumping clown, jumping up and down, trying to win their favor, but in their eyes, it was just a joke.
To me, this is a complete fool.
I cared about him so much, valued him so much, decided so earnestly to overcome all difficulties and dangers and strive to stand with him, I am...
Like him that way.
It was precisely because of this that the slap was extremely painful.
On the day at the mountain gate, Mozun Sangluo reminded me that because I cared more about Luo Wuchen, I didn't take his reminder to heart.
Ke Luo Wuchen didn't give any explanation for this either.
I think I pretended to be deaf and dumb at the time, maybe not because I wanted to give him a chance.
But he didn't seize that opportunity.
Was it because he was too slow to think of explaining it to me?
No, it's because he doesn't take me seriously.
Because I don't care, I don't take it seriously.
But now, the truth is bloodied in front of me, and the scene is so ugly.
He just knew to explain to me.
Too late.
No matter what he wants to say now, I will...
I don't want to hear it anymore.
Shame, anger, being fooled... all kinds of emotions are entangled, and I feel that my brain is in a state of fever, like a box stuffed with too many things, in a state of bursting at any time.
I hate this feeling, it makes me not like myself, I will never allow my emotions to control me.
"Xie Wan," Luo Wuchen glanced at Sangluo Mozun who was leaning against the door with his arms folded, grabbed my arm, and begged, "Can we have a good talk?"
"Just the two of us, and I'll tell you everything."
"There is a misunderstanding between us and we need to talk about it."
He is begging me.
so poor.
There was a dull pain in my heart.I have always been a demon who is easy to soften my heart, let alone when facing someone I like.
If it were in the past, even if he only showed the slightest gloomy look, I would not be able to help but soften my heart.
But my tolerance for him should not be based on his lies.
"Demon Lord Ling Jue," I pulled my hand away from his fingertips bit by bit with no expression on my face.
Everything is pulled away along with it.
I think that's probably why I like him.
"There's no need to talk about it." I said lightly, "There's no need."
Luo Wuchen said that Demon Lord Sangluo is cunning and insidious and should not be trusted, and told me not to contact Demon Lord Sangluo.
Thinking about it now, I don't know whether he said those words for my own good, or he was afraid that I would know his despicable thoughts that made me sick.
Trust is like glass, the most fragile and cannot tolerate any flaws. Once broken, it is difficult to restore it to its original state.
I looked deeply at Luo Wuchen.
It's amazing, even though there was only less than a stick of incense between them, I have completely forgotten what my love for Luo Wuchen looks like.
Now I look at him again, at the person I once liked so much, but I only feel strange.
I was confused by his appearance, thinking that Luo Wuchen was as cold as a banished fairy, but I didn't expect that he actually has such a flamboyant heart.
substitute……
Ha, I feel desolate for a while, he really knows how to abuse others.
"I told you to read a joke." I collected my mood, and said to Sang Luo and Xu Fang beside me, "Master Mozun still wants to drink? Let's drink in another place."
"Xie Wan..." Luo Wuchen reached out and grabbed my hand, as if wanting to keep me.
Now seeing him seem to care about me, I just think he is hypocritical.
In front of Mozun Sangluo and Xu Fanglai, I didn't want to get angry, so I just lowered my voice and warned him: "Let go of me."
Luo Wuchen had a complicated expression: "Xie Wan, listen to me tell you, you actually—"
I haven't opened my mouth yet, but Sangluo Mozun spoke first.
"Jianzun Lingjue! You have already killed Xie Wan," Sangluo Mozun's eyes burst into anger, "Are you still obsessed with obsession?"
When mentioning his dead wife, Luo Wuchen looked at Sang Luo with hatred, "You have no right to mention him."
"I'm not qualified, so you have it?" Sang Luo Mozun sneered: "If Xie Wan wasn't pregnant with your child, if he wasn't going to give birth to your child, how could he die?"
"He died for you!" Mozun Sang Luo said angrily.
The blood on Luo Wuchen's face faded.
The secret of the past was uncovered nakedly, and I froze.
How touching, the beloved Succubus died to give birth to his child, no wonder he can't get over it.
But what about me?
Do I deserve this?
I feel unwilling and angry.
Think of me as Xie Wan, the first disciple of Cang Yu, with fifteen alchemy knots and three hundred transformation gods, in terms of identity, appearance, and appearance, I am not outstanding in any way.
He may not like me or love me, but why should he——
Why take me as a substitute for a dead succubus.
I am angry at Luo Wuchen's shamelessness, and I am even more angry at my own stupidity. If I hadn't been blinded by love and love, and rushed to be abused by others, how could I have caused this situation.
Xu Fanglai still didn't know the relationship between me and Luo Wuchen, seeing my undisguised rejection of Luo Wuchen, without saying a word, he slapped Luo Wuchen's hand holding me away, and protected me behind him.
"Demon Lord Ling Jue, my Xie Wan asked you to let go, didn't you hear?"
Luo Wuchen didn't look at him, but just looked straight at me with such sad eyes.
It's as sad as if you have been wronged by the sky and you can't speak.
I feel so boring.
"Come on, don't you want to drink too?" I patted Xu Fanglai's arm, "Come on, let's go drink."
As I said that, I turned my head, looked at Sangluo Mozun who was standing not far away without saying a word, and invited: "Master Mozun, do you want to come together?"
Sang Luo shook his head with a wry smile, put away the words with his sweetheart's name on them, and left.
I looked at the leftover writing on the table case, and suddenly walked over and smashed it.
"Let's go." I dropped the pieces and dragged Xu Fanglai out.
"Xie Wan, I'm sorry, don't go..." Luo Wuchen's voice sounded low.
My heart trembled slightly.
"I didn't mean to upset you, I really didn't want to upset you like that... I'm sorry I screwed up again."
Seeing such a helpless and sad Luo Wuchen, my heart was indeed shaken a little.
After all, he was someone I really liked.
But when I thought of his concealment from me, and when he looked at me and thought of another demon in his heart, I regained my heart of stone.
Of all things, the one I can't accept the most is betrayal.
I offered my sincerity in exchange for another sincerity.
If I give ten points, I want him to pay me back ten points.
Anything less, not even an iota, will not work.
If it's not mine, I'd rather not have it.
"I didn't lie to you. I really like you."
I closed my eyes and said calmly and indifferently, "I don't want it anymore."
"What you like, I don't need."
After speaking, I followed Xu Fanglai and walked out.
Only Luo Wuchen was left standing there in a daze, beside him was the bewildered Little Chang'an.
I thought of something and looked back at Luo Wuchen.
Meeting his suddenly bright eyes, I took off the storage ring that Luo Wuchen gave me back then.
"Give it back to you."
The light in Luo Wuchen's eyes dimmed.
I retracted my hand, hid it in my sleeve and secretly clenched it into a fist.
Pain brings me sobriety, and allows me to maintain a surface of composure.
I straightened my back, raised my head, and looked straight at Luo Wuchen: "For the compensation of the mountain gate, Xie will not be entangled with too many Demon Venerables. At that time, Cang Yu will calculate a statistic and inform the Demon Venerable, hoping that the Demon Venerable will pay the spirit stones." Don’t shirk when it’s time.”
Luo Wuchen froze for a moment, the injury in his eyes made my heart ache, "No."
Chang An, who had been cowardly and silent all this time, was picked up by Luo Wuchen.
He seemed to realize something, his immature voice was crying.
"Mother..." Chang An bit his lip and looked at me sadly, "Don't you want me? Why don't you want me..."
"I'm not your mother."
"Father, mother...why do you drive us away, Chang'an don't leave mother, Chang'an don't leave..."
My lips trembled, and I couldn't say anything for a moment.
He didn't understand what was going on, only that he was about to be abandoned.
Luo Wuchen's footsteps were slightly stagnant, and he looked back at me.
I said coldly: "I think Sword Master Ling Jue won't use children as a tool to blackmail him no matter how bad he is, right?"
The tears in Chang An's eyes fell down, "...Why? I don't want to be like this...Father, please thank uncle..."
When I went there, every time I saw Chang'an's tears, I felt distressed and uncontrollably regressed.
For a moment, I thought, if Little Chang'an was not Luo Wuchen's child, I would also be willing to keep him in the Cangyu Sect and treat him as a parent.
It's a pity that there has never been an if in the world.
Luo Wuchen's hand holding Chang'an tightened for a moment.
"Chang'an," Luo Wuchen said, "don't embarrass your mother."
"No... woo I don't want... woo woo woo wa..."
Like a puppet whose soul was emptied, I watched Luo Wuchen hug the crying Chang'an and leave numbly.
I should have done this long ago.
Every time I excused myself by saying that I was too busy to sort out the ambiguous relationship with Luo Wuchen and his son.
But in fact, it's not because I'm busy, it's not because I don't want to part with them, neither the big ones nor the small ones, I'm greedy for the feeling of being needed by them, and I let myself retreat from them again and again.
Until their figures completely disappeared from my sight, I looked at Xu Fanglai and pushed him, "What are you still doing, go drink."
I need to get really drunk.
Wake up and put everything back on track.
Xu Fanglai didn't move, he grabbed my shoulder and stared at me straight: "What happened?"
I was horrified by him, sighed, and explained in a few words: "It's not just that I suddenly discovered that my name is exactly the same as Luo Wuchen's deceased wife."
Xu Fanglai was stunned for a moment, and then came to his senses.
"Grass!" Xu Fanglai cursed, and slammed the tree trunk hard, "He dared to use you as a substitute!"
I tightened my palms and made a calm look: "Xu Fangfang, you are too serious."
My tone was very calm, "It's just a name bump."
"Come." Xu Fanglai pulled me to dig out two altars of spiritual wine with mud in the master's yard, "Drink."
"Okay." I have a pot with him: "Do it."
After the two jars of wine touched each other, we hugged the jars and drank silently.
I don't know how long it took, the drunkenness came up, I rubbed my drowsy head, and looked at Xu Fanglai, who was lying on the table drunk and unconscious.
I picked up the jar of wine under his hands, and there was still more than half of it left.
"Xu Fangfang, I put you down in just one and a half jars, and you're not drunk, you know how to talk big." I laughed at him, and drank the rest of the jar of wine indifferently. upside down.
I drank alone and fell asleep at some point.
When I woke up, I just had a splitting headache.
Half of it was the hangover, and the other half was the heartbreak of being betrayed.
I struggled to open my eyes, and slowly got up while holding my forehead.
There is still a faint aftertaste of unwillingness and anger in my heart, but it seems to be separated by a thick layer of veil, which is vague and not very clear.
I can't even remember why I was so sad last night. When I recall the details, I just feel that my head is like a drum that is about to be hammered. It will explode unbearably.
Xu Fanglai fell asleep on my bed.
I step over him and get out of bed to wash.
In the past Xu Fanglai always told me to look in the mirror.
I took a picture now.
It's really not as likable as I imagined before.I looked at the tired face reflected in the mirror and thought dumbly.
I numbly washed my face, tied back my messy hair, and changed my clothes that smelled of alcohol.
The cold water was splashed on my face, and the cold brought my mind sober.
The stupidity of the past has already existed, and no matter how much I regret it, I can’t change the established facts. It’s meaningless to dwell on these things. What I should do now is to remember the lesson, never do it again, and…
I made a decision in my heart, and slowly let out a tense breath.
The anger and dissatisfaction faded away, and there was only a deep sense of incomprehension left in my heart—is what Luo Wuchen did to me really worth my anger?
Recalling last night's self that seemed to be controlled by emotions, I only feel strange.
I don't understand why I am so aggressive.
If I were the current me, I would end my liking for Luo Wuchen in a more dignified manner instead of making the scene so ugly.
Fortunately, the farce of that night did not cause much splash in Cang Yuzong.
Xu Fanglai usually likes to expose my old background, but he will always defend me in this kind of matter, and he will not speak out if he is killed.
Sang Luo Mozun is not a gossip demon who likes to gossip everywhere. As for the two parties, Luo Wuchen and me, they will not take the initiative to promote it.
As a result, that unpleasant memory was quickly forgotten by everyone.
At least on the surface, it is true.